5 EXTREMELY HELPFUL STEPS TO TACKLE DISAPPOINTMENT AND STAY POSITIVE...

Girl standing alone in disappointment and depression.

Positive experiences bring tons of smiles in our life and boost us to build consistent expectations for a similar future. However, as soon as failure shows up in any of the ongoing tasks, it brings a lot of disappointment, sometimes on a small scale and sometimes completely unbearable as well. In such a situation, if we learn to deal with the existing downfall and learn from it instead of feeling broken, it can actually pass-by teaching us about unimaginable elements for better personal growth in the times to come. That’s what I have felt, and that’s what many of you must have experienced as well. 

Here, I would like to share how I tackle disappointment, get rid of my lows in life, and bring myself back to a joyful state.

1. ACCEPTANCE OF CURRENT SCENARIO

The foremost step to avoid getting upset is to accept the reality and absorb it within ourselves without cribbing about our mistakes which led to hurtful results. Running away from reality won’t help, and hiding the reality behind fake excuses will rather intensify the pain within. 

I believe, it is better to feel the pain for some time, cry over it if emotions break through, vent out those emotions and relieve ourselves from unexpected aggression getting accumulated inside us because of the frustration and disappointment. This acceptance won’t end all the pain right away of course, but will definitely divert our mind from the negativity inside it and will push us to think about covering up the loss of time and efforts by learning from it and implementing better steps next time.

2. ANALYSIS OF SHORTCOMINGS AND HOW TO RECTIFY THEM

Now that the time has passed by, and won’t return in any possible way, so it won’t be of any help to keep blaming ourselves for the failure. Once we have accepted it, its time to move on towards the next step i.e. to analyze what went wrong in the previous attempt and how to rectify it in the next one. This cannot be done unless we accept our mistakes and learn from them. Once deep thought is given over the failed efforts, we ought to pen down the step-by-step procedure needed to be followed in future so that even if new issues show up, at least the previous ones don’t ruin the progress.

3. REMEMBER – YOU HAD THE GUTS TO TRY AT LEAST!

Each task has multiple results and all of them are not satisfactory. Disappointment is bound to occur at some point in life when we work on something new. But how many people in the world actually gather all the courage and dare to take the risk? Not many!

Rather than going into the statistics of surveys available on the internet, let’s do a reality check by looking around us and counting people who actually went out of their comfort zone and tried something new and risked their time and efforts over a completely out-of-the-box idea with totally unpredictable outcomes. How many people can you think of in your contacts? Not many, of course. The very pulse of having guts to try it, is worth appreciating a million times and worth cherishing; Just because we fail, doesn’t mean we should quit or not try it again, it is merely a hurdle teaching us to perform even better in the next step. If we had the desired strength and confidence in the first go, we are definitely going to have more in the next attempt yielding better results. The very thought of it can motivate us to do wonders.

4. EXPECT LESS, HOPE MORE.

We tend to expect a lot out of our efforts, be it in our profession or day-to-day activities or even to maintain relations with people, and such expectations often lead to disappointment when things do not go as expected. Expecting perfection is a natural tendency, and same is being disappointed in unwanted situations. The best way to avoid this upsetting scenario is to expect less, and hope more. Simple yet difficult!

Hope refers to our wish about something to take place how we want it to be, in case it happens; Expectation is completely different, as it refers to our thought about how exactly something is going to happen. When we hope for something to happen in a specific way, it develops positive impulses. On the other hand, when we expect something to happen, it develops curiosity as to when our expectations will be fulfilled. If we hope for something and it doesn’t happen, it doesn’t hurt us much as there was never a demand or precise expectation of the same. If we expect something and we don’t get it, it hurts us to the core and leaves us disappointed.

Therefore, what I believe and what I have experienced, is that, we should hope for the best but not expect the best. Understanding the difference, and implementing this aspect in our lifestyle, makes it relatively easy to remain happy and away from disappointment.

5. STAY AWAY FROM THE COMPARISON GAME

Comparing ourselves with others, or our work with that of others, or our assets with those of others, or anything of our possession with that of others, is the most common cause of depressing thoughts. To some extent, it may motivate a person to work harder and rise above competition. But, in our society, different kinds of comparisons are done on no relevant grounds at all, with no precise alternatives at all, and about no valid logic at all. Such irrelevant comparisons should have no space in our lives, but still exist on a large scale and lead to uncontrollable thoughts full of negativity many a times. Staying away from such comparisons is the need of the hour, to remain in high spirits.

TO SUM IT UP:

Everyone comes across disappointing and depressing thoughts in some part of life. Time teaches us to tackle them as we grow and understand life better. It is all in our mind. We shouldn’t let the mind control us; it is we who must control it with maturity. And this control is only possible if we accept the reality and let bygones be bygones.

Ego and stubborn behaviour must be kept aside, acceptance of defeat must be made an integral part of our nature and agreeing to our mistakes must be learnt at the earliest. We must accept that the previous situations were not in our control, and are not in our control at present as well, as they are gone. So why do we allow the pain to persist? The answer to it is within us, the solution to it is within us as well. We are the ones who must solve the riddle and finish the disappointment as soon as we can.

God has blessed us with more things to cherish than to be disappointed about. Also, if we allow stress or disappointment or depression to take over our mind, why can’t we allow stability and contentment and positivity to take over it too?

Healing is undoubtedly a long process, but then, we need to be flexible enough to let the healing do its part. If we won’t give it enough space, how will it even initiate its vibes. I truly believe, and have felt and experienced it as well, that we have all the powers to dig deep inside ourselves and be what others can’t. It is just a matter of time when we realize our innate powers and potential and follow them, and be our own strength.

Always be stable, patient, kind, strong, confident, happy, satisfied and thankful to the Almighty. Don’t let yourself break, face the world with strength and smile, and do what you are meant to do, not what you are told to do.

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